For over 25 years I’ve prayed for an eventual end-of-sentence date for my incarcerated son. But God hasn’t answered that prayer in the way I envisioned. Instead, God is using Jason as a missionary behind the razor wire—teaching, mentoring, and encouraging other inmates to establish a personal relationship with Christ and to live out biblical principles that produce transformed lives.
There’s something deeply human about the way we long for God to respond swiftly to our cries. Whether it’s healing for a loved one, provision for a pressing need, or clarity in a confusing situation, we bring our requests before God with earnest hearts, hoping for a “yes” and hoping it comes quickly. But what happens when the heavens seem silent? When answers don’t come, or when they come in a form we didn’t ask for—or want? In those moments, we can feel forgotten, confused, or even hurt. And yet, what if God’s silence, or His “no,” is actually His mercy? What if unanswered prayer is not God’s neglect, but His loving, sovereign redirection? It’s a thought that stretches our faith but has the power to deepen our trust.
Here are six powerful, hope-filled benefits of unanswered prayer:
1. Unanswered prayers reveal God’s bigger plan.
God’s perspective is eternal; ours is limited by time and emotion. Isaiah 55:8-9 reminds us, “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord.” What we interpret as delay or denial, may actually be divine protection or preparation. Elisabeth Elliot once said, “God never withholds from His child that which His love and wisdom call good.” When God doesn’t answer as we expect, it’s because He sees what we can’t.
2. They strengthen our faith muscles.
Just like physical muscles are built through resistance, faith grows in seasons of waiting and wondering. James 1:3 says, “Because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” When we don’t get immediate answers, we’re invited to trust, even when the outcome is unclear. Pastor Tim Keller wrote, “God will only give you what you would have asked for if you knew everything He knows.” That’s the essence of faith: trusting without seeing.
3. They deepen our relationship with God.
If every prayer were instantly answered, would we seek God—or just what He can do for us? Unanswered prayers draw us closer to Him, not just the benefits that come from a relationship with Him. In prolonged seasons of unanswered prayer, we’re invited to lean into God’s presence more deeply. As Oswald Chambers once wrote, “The meaning of prayer is that we get hold of God, not of the answer.”
4. They refine our desires.
Sometimes what we pray for changes as God shapes our hearts. Psalm 37:4 promises, “Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.” But when we delight in God, He often transforms those desires before fulfilling them. C.S. Lewis said it well: “We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.” God doesn’t just grant our requests—He reforms them.
5. They make room for greater miracles.
A delayed answer isn’t a denied answer. Think of Lazarus—Jesus waited four days after His death to arrive. Why? So that the miracle would be unmistakable. John 11:4 tells us, “This sickness will not end in death… it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.” What feels like unanswered prayer might be God setting the stage for a greater testimony.
6. They teach us to pray in alignment with God’s will.
As we mature spiritually, unanswered prayers refine our ability to pray according to God’s will. 1 John 5:14 promises, “If we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.” Over time, the prayers we offer begin to echo heaven more than earth. Charles Spurgeon encouraged believers with this: “If the Lord delays, wait for Him. If He denies your request, be sure that denial is best. Let the Father be the judge.”
When You’re Tempted to Stop Praying…
Maybe you’ve been praying for months, or even years. And still no answer. You’re tired. Frustrated. Disappointed. But don’t give up. The Bible commands in 1 Thessalonians 5:17 to “pray without ceasing.” Jesus Himself urged us to “always pray and not give up” (Luke 18:1). Prayer isn’t a magic formula—it’s a relationship with the One who sees the end from the beginning.
- Keep praying when it feels pointless.
- Keep praying when the answers don’t come.
- Keep praying when your faith is shaky and your heart is weary.
God is listening. His silence is not absence. His “no” is not rejection. And His delays are never without purpose. Trust that the One who knows you best loves you most—and is always at work, even when you can’t see it.
Today, revisit a prayer you’ve stopped praying. Bring it back to God—not to demand an answer, but to surrender it with trust. Ask Him to use even the unanswered prayers to draw you closer to Him, to shape your heart, and to fulfill His perfect will.
The greatest miracle may not be what you receive—but who you become while waiting.
Question: What is a prayer you’re waiting for God to answer right now? (I’d like to join you in praying for that need.) What are you learning as you wait?
I have prayed literally for years for my single son, living in Alaska, hard working and alone. He is now 44 and I’ve prayed for a wife for him, not to be alone. Not just a partner, but to find a loving and caring woman to share life with. He is not gay. Lord Jesus, hear my prayer.. I am learning to trust the Lord and that He is able to do more than I can ask or even imagine.
Michelle, I’m lifting your request to the Lord right now. What a wonderful mama you are!
Michelle, I am praying the same for my two sons, 55 and 52. Every. Day. God please bless these men with Christian women to share their lives with and serve you together.
I’ve been doing the same for my son. He’ll be 34. God’s perfect timing.
I have a wonderful godly 40-year-old friend who has been praying for a godly husband for many years. Maybe we could connect them.
My 27 year old daughter has an anoxic brain injury. I pray for total healing, this side of heaven. It has been 7 years since she visited the dentist to have her wisdom teeth removed and he over sedated her. Her mind is so sharp but she struggles with her speech, walking, vision and hand coordination. She loved the Lord but is growing wearying in his timing for healing.
Thank you for your oesyers
I feel the weight of this struggle, Cindi. I’m praying for both you and your daughter. What a long journey you’ve had.
Typo in last comment, my last name is Hayes. My sons name is Cory.
My daughter is incarcerated in Gatesville Tx . Please pray for her to change her life .
joining you in prayer—-may she somehow find Jesus even there!
My husband is incarcerated and he is working on an appeal I am praying his appeal comes through and he is released.
My husband is an alcoholic. He believes in God but sees no point in reading the Bible.
I am weary.
Thank you for this encouraging post, Carol. I’m praying for renewed strength, and revitalized joy as I walk alongside my husband who’s had Parkinson’s for the last ten years. I’m weary.
Thank you, Carol,
I needed to read this today. I’ve been in the “waiting room” for decades for a loved one.
I love you dearly. Thank you for your perseverance and godly perspective.
I prayed for 30 years for my husband to love Our Heavenly Father. After all that time
he had a revelation and he couldn’t stop reading the Bible and talking about God
He converted many people. Praise God
But in all those years God was working on me too
He taught me my 3 P’s —
“Prayer, Patience and Perseverance “
My darling husband now has Alzheimers disease and can’t remember much but can still say some prayers
And I am using my 3 P’s to get us through each day
I Thank my God for hearing and answering my prayers in His time and His way
“PRAISE GOD”
I love your three P’s but oh how it’d be nice to not need them. Praying for you as you walk this journey with your husband. I walked it with my Jesus loving Mama and it is not for the weak. God will carry you through though.
Carol, this was a “hit the mark” word for me today. Our oldest canceled us out of her life almost 5 years ago now. We have not seen or talked to her or our three grandchildren in all that time. Thank you for this fresh oil from the Lord. I read recently that the ministry of blessing others comes from the oil of what crushed you. It’s so true. Truly what has crushed you has produced an oil that has brought healing and comfort to so many souls! I lead the prayer ministry for Carol McLeod and I sent this article out to our 38 Warrior Moms who are praying for their prodigals to return. Thank you again!
Oh Christy, I know this pain. It’s is so horrible. Thankfully we only insured it for about a year but she only came back out of need. I don’t know if she would have otherwise. I live in continuous fear of going through it again. I pray for your sweet and broken heart. My friend is a psychologist and she says this is becoming more and more common among younger people. I simply cannot understand it. I am lifting you up in prayer to our heavenly father who understands and who will carry you through.
Such a good reminder. God bless you! Love, Gina
I’m in prayer for a lovely 28 yr old granddaughter with an incurable disease called EGPA. I’m trusting the Lord to heal her in ways that only He can.
We are praying for our daughter to be cured of her stage 4 metastatic breast cancer. She was diagnosed 4 years ago and is fighting to be here for her two children, Sophia age 16 and Ethan age 12.
this was so timely for me today. I am writing my 40 year old son’s obituary today and planning his celebration of life. For years he struggle on and off with drug addiction. 8 weeks ago he was in the hospital on a ventilator for the past 6 weeks we were able to bring him home and spend time with a clear headed son who was so receptive to the gospel and I have the assurance he is in heaven. He spent time with family and friends. Though my heart is breaking I am so grateful I had this time with him.
I have been following you, Carol, for many years after a friend recommended your book When I Lay Down My Isaac. Your story is inspiring. Our son is 44 years old and has spent the last 17 years behind the walls of federal prison. He left behind a wife and 3 beautiful children who are all adults now. He has missed countless things in that amount of time. His charges and penalty (32 year sentence) were severe and a result of an opioid addiction fed by a pain management doctor that led to armed robberies of several pharmacies. Thankfully, he did not hurt anyone but made threats to and I thank God for that. My prayers have changed multiple times over the years but a few remain the same. I ask for God’s wisdom, truth and goodness to surround him in such an evil place. And I pray God allows this momma to see her son a free man before I die. It is the second prayer I feel unanswered to the point of not wanting to keep praying it. Then God gives us a glimmer of hope here and there as the judicial system changes some of the laws that caused such a long sentence. My prayer now is for them to make the laws retroactive which would benefit him drastically. God is still working and I am growing weary and older day by day. Please God, do the impossible in his situation to bring glory to Your name!
Restoration of my son’s faith
For healing or to feel human again without constant pain
Praying for a financial blessing so that my son can return to college, it broke our hearts that he had to leave. I felt like we failed him.
I am praying my apostate daughter returns to Jesus. I pray her autistic son, my grandson and I will be reunited. It’s been 2 years since he has been in my life.
I pray for my son, Christian, who is incarcerated. He is looking at double digits. I’m asking our Lord and savior to please bring a fair plea deal. His court is on June 9th. My son turns 25 in 2 days. He’s looking at 20 years. Lord look into my heart and hear my prayers. In Jesus name, Amen
Praying for repentance, salvation, deliverance and healing for my children and grandchildren.
I’m praying for my kids to get saved and praying for my Kidneys function to improve it was functioning at 19 percent
I’ve been praying for my husband and I to have a baby for years. Because of my age I realize that it is now close to impossible (by human standards), but I pray that God will use me in other ways and that I may serve Him and His kingdom.
My son and grandson to reconcile, they are estranged right now.
Grandson graduates from college on June 14, 2025. I would love for them to reconcile so father would attend the ceremony.
Amen!
I enjoyed the topic and I do need to stay focused in prayer sometimes I think that once I have prayed for any situation I really don’t have to pray for it again, but I don’t know if that is right, please share a topic about that if you’d like, thanks for always blessing me, blessings to you from Abba, Shalom
My son was in prison for 10 years and was released in 2018. He struggles with relationships and depression. I’ve prayed for years for him to get close to God and turn his life over to Him. His name is Matthew. I heard you speak about your son years ago in Little Rock, AR. I have 4 of your books, and have shared them. You have helped me. Thank you for all you do.
I’ve been praying for months about a medical issue and it seems with every test I get sent for another one! I’m getting very weary!
There was a specific issue I prayed over for five years. During those five years I changed the way I prayed when the prayers went unanswered. I even gave God some really good suggestions. My prayers still went unanswered. My thought was God knows things are going to change so I waited “kind of” patiently. Still no answer. Finally, one Sunday morning after hearing a message from my pastor, I prayed and let God know I was leaving it all into His hands. If He chose to keep things the way they were for as long as He wanted I accepted His plan. I didn’t need to understand why. I told God I trusted Him completely. The very next day my original prayer from five years earlier was answered. For five years I thought I was waiting for God to answer my prayers, but actually God was waiting for me–waiting for me to let go and trust Him.
I pray for your family often.
My prayer is that my incarcerated son will be moved to a closer facility for his children’s sake. Currently about 5 hours away and has two sets of twins ,8, and 10.
They grieve his absence and we can only afford to take them about 2 times a year. Thankyou for your example.
Praying for my brother that’s been incarcerated the past 32 years. Praying for his release and for justice
My 40yr old son is incarcerated in Tucson prison for the 3rd time (last time was 13yrs ago) now for 5years. This is addiction related – I’ve been praying for Clif’s soul to be rescued and the Lord to reign in his heart. Trouble after trouble. May this be the season in the darkest place. Pray he won’t be like those around him numbing his mind and sleeping away troubles. Oh Lord have mercy.
Thank you for this beautiful reminder to stay strong in seasons that break our hearts.
I have been estranged from my 63 yr old son for 6 years over a horrible text I wrote him after being at a party drinking champagne. The words that came out were nothing I have ever even thought and I have no idea how I could have even written those horrible words. It’s my fault, he’s forgiven me but doesn’t trust me and never wants to have a relationship with me again. I was 17 when he was born, I did everything in the world for him and adore him; he tried to get his kids and ex-wife to abandon me, but they have not and don’t plan to. For that I am grateful. My son was reared in the church and I keep claiming the verse, “Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart.” He sends me flowers on my birthday and Mother’s Day and I am respecting his wishes not to try to bother him.
Additionally, I would like prayers for my grandson to meet a woman who will love him and establish a family. He has never had a girlfriend and he is 33 years old.
I know and believe God is the great controller of all things and my faith has grown and changed during this period, I know my son will act in his own time, I pray it’s before I die. I’m 80 years old. Thank you for your prayers. And please keep on writing.
Very, very good blog!! I so needed to be reminded to not give up!
I’m praying for my 23 year old son who is also incarcerated and that he will be set free very soon. And that he will be blessed and healed when he is free.
Praying for our son, his girlfriend of 14 years, his two adult children and her adult daughter. He grew up in the church but none of the others. They need Jesus as their saviour. ♥️
Truth. It’s certainly not easy or simple. But just keep believing. It’s okay to not pray. Father knows, he hears our silence, he loves us.
I have prayed for all 3 of my children. The younger 2 are believers and serve in the churches they attend. However, I have one son who is wayward. He lived on the street for 3 years or more. He was using drugs and was arrested several times. He was placed on supervised probation but didn’t follow through and it was revoked. He was arrested about a year ago and was released on probation again. I check his court record and he has been paying on his fines for 8 or 9 months. I’m trusting he is off the streets and working. I haven’t heard from him for 3 years. I have no idea where he is other than the Phoenix metro. I have no way to contact him. I have peace that God has, is and will protect him and never stop seeking him. I will pray for him until until I die
Thank you! Thank you! What a blessing it was to read this.
Praying for our merciful God to bring miraculous healing in the darkest time of my life and use my story as a testimony for others. As I wait God has shown up through prayer, meals, financial gifts, and people even mowing our lawn. He is walking with me and changing my heart to see the need of those hurting around me. All glory be to Christ.
Carol, I was at Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference in May when I learned of your story. I would have never guessed your family trial. I only remember your smiles both at conference and on Social Media. Mine is not an answer to prayer in hindsight. God was so present; as close as His breath leaning over my left ear as I sat in the front pew the day of dad’s funeral in 1997. The shock of his suicide at age 91 eventually put me in survival mode to be there for my stepmom and my large family. There was no raising of the dead. But God provided comfort beyond what is humanly possible. As the youngest with 10 siblings I was able to speak for the family at the church service where there was a large attendance. God gave me peace, joy and love the minute we arrived at the church. There’s more to the story but I couldn’t have imagined God’s presence and love any closer unless I stood at Heaven’s gate.
Continued prayers for your family.
– DW
Hi Carol, thank you for this reminder regarding unanswered prayers. We are currently praying for 3 of our 4 daughters to return to God. They just don’t stand where they use to stand. They have bought into the culture. It breaks our hearts and we can only trust God that he is hearing our prayers on their behalf. What a wonderful thing God is doing in the life of your son.
Carol, I am waiting for God to bring my oldest daughter,Alesha, back to him. I am seeing glimmers of hope but I want it ti actually be – now. I get inpatient, I get it inpatient with her poor decisions and the weight that adds to my husband and I. Please pray for my patience. I do believe I am seeing Gods work in her life and I am scared she will slip backwards instead of moving forwards towards him.
This is good. Thanks for sharing. I’ve been praying for the release of my fiance whose serving a life sentence in Florida Department of Corrections. This has truly tested my faith, however I’m believing the impossibilities of man to be replaced by the POSSIBILITIES of God. I know God can do it. Together we stand on Mark 11:23-26. We speak to that mountain ( prison sentence) and demand it to be cast in the sea. We know this is a faith walk .